Teasing Out the Recession’s Cause

Here’s how not to do it.  Ask a stupid question and support it with  flimsy science from obscure* environmental journals.  But, ah so! It’s kinda actually a smart argument.

…a primary reason that bubble may have burst was that homeowners had less money to pay their mortgages after rising costs of gasoline and electricity ate into their budgets

Energy prices may actually play a huge role in financial downturns.  And the true death knell’s gonna fall in the next 50 years.  In that time frame, the suburbs will convulse like my colon after a three day bout of stress-induced constipation, finally giving up their black, hate-filled bounty.

When cheap fuel disappears, living 20, 30, 40 miles or even farther from your work will literally break the bank, and disinsentivize living down winding roads to spatial lots with cookie cutter houses in dark, silent neighborhoods at great, inconvenient distances from just about anything a fucking growing child can do for enjoyment.  WHY!? Why did I have to grow up in a sterile petri dish of tepid Buddy Holly, 1950’s values!?

Well, soon my childhood’s nightmare can die a hero’s death.  Did I say hero? I meant  an old, ignorant and constipated hermit’s death.

________________________

*Yeah, I really can’t back that up.  It’s not Nature, or anything that I’ve seen on EBSCO or JSTOR while doing papers.

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